Recently I've noticed that it doesn't take very much to annoy me. Another email asking whether or not we invited someone to the wedding? Annoyed. Finding out someone hasn't booked their ticket to the wedding yet? Annoyed. Not realizing that I'm inside the moving truck before moving it? Annoyed.
I don't know where this spirit of contempt is coming from. I'm guessing it's a biproduct of stress, so I'm trying to relax. Part of it might be resentment because this planning feels very lonely. I know people want to help, but usually W is the person I need to help me with stuff (just because they're decisions, not physical tasks) and he's not around all the time. I'll be glad when planning is over because maybe then I can be normal. Maybe. Just maybe.
I'll try and counteract the negativity with some positive thoughts:
1) I love my caterer. She's been great at accommodating our requests and is doing everything she can to ensure that I don't have to worry about her part.
2) I love my decorations gal. I stopped worrying about reception decorations the minute I appointed her.
3) I'm thankful for W and his willingness to move all my junk to the new apartment.
4) I'm thankful for our new apartment! It might be a little on the older side and a little further from work, but I'm glad we found something affordable with enough space for us.
5) I'm glad for good girl friends who patiently listen to me complain about wedding stuff even though their lives are much more serious/important.
6) I'm thankful that work has been manageable lately. I don't know if I'm getting better assignments on purpose but it's been a blessing to not have to worry about staying 3 hours later just to finish up paperwork.
7) I love that Bisquick pancakes can actually be pretty tasty. I really wanted pancakes the other day and that totally hit the spot.
8) I'm thankful for a spa gift certificate from a certain former roommate- I was saving it for the wedding, and it'll be the perfect indulgence for this week.
9) My sibs have been phenomenal- anything I've asked of them they've helped with, and then some.
10) W has been really patient even though I was really snappy with him yesterday.
11) I'm thankful that Craigslist exists. The couch that no one wants to move will be moved tonight.
12) I'm glad that Facebook lets us see pictures from other people's albums even if we're not friends with them.
Okay, that's enough for now. Time to move a couch.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Saturday, July 19, 2008
secret single behavior
Is it weird that I suddenly want to exert my independence more and more as the wedding gets closer? I love W, of course, and I can't wait to marry him, but part of me really enjoys the alone time I've been able to have since he's only in town on the weekends. I miss him like crazy, but I get really excited when I get to go somewhere by myself or have some kind of adventure. Maybe my feminist side wants to remind me that I'm a very capable person. Or maybe this is some weird bachelorette mechanism that kicks in once I realize that I'm gonna be married to this person forever. Sorta like in Full House when Uncle Jesse goes skydiving right before his wedding because he feels like he's not gonna have any adventures anymore.
Really though? I know W will be fine if I have a weekend with my girls. And our schedules will be different so I can still explore and learn and fuel the economy alone if I choose (although a lot of times it's more fun when W's there, especially if we're eating cuz then I can try more food). I think when it comes down to it I'm not that worried about missing out cuz I'm married...I'm more worried about missing out on things if I'm pregnant or if I have a bunch of kids running around. And I know that's a ways off, but after I get married it could be ANY TIME. Granted, we're taking measures to try and prevent getting pregnant right away, but who knows what will happen. I know I shouldn't be worried, especially since I want to have kids eventually, but it hit me during premarital counseling that we need to be loving and supporting each other not only for ourselves, but for our future family. Our family! Wow! Something that I've dreamed of for so long could be a reality soon. Crazy.
This whole process is so unreal. Thanks for sharing it with me. =)
Really though? I know W will be fine if I have a weekend with my girls. And our schedules will be different so I can still explore and learn and fuel the economy alone if I choose (although a lot of times it's more fun when W's there, especially if we're eating cuz then I can try more food). I think when it comes down to it I'm not that worried about missing out cuz I'm married...I'm more worried about missing out on things if I'm pregnant or if I have a bunch of kids running around. And I know that's a ways off, but after I get married it could be ANY TIME. Granted, we're taking measures to try and prevent getting pregnant right away, but who knows what will happen. I know I shouldn't be worried, especially since I want to have kids eventually, but it hit me during premarital counseling that we need to be loving and supporting each other not only for ourselves, but for our future family. Our family! Wow! Something that I've dreamed of for so long could be a reality soon. Crazy.
This whole process is so unreal. Thanks for sharing it with me. =)
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
one month!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HOLY COW.
There's SO much to do in one month...luckily I had time on the plane to make multiple to-do lists, so I feel a little better. But still...wow! W and I were talking about it today and it's finally starting to sink in for both of us. Maybe it's cuz we have an apartment now? I dunno what it is, but now it's crunch time. Like, for real!
We're still having issues with the registry (aka W's being picky about what goes on there and I don't care about what goes on there cuz it's the least of my worries). Any suggestions on what to ask for? I already threw in some fun things and people bought them for us! (homemade ice cream, here we come!) Suggestions are welcome- I keep forgetting basic household things because I have SO MUCH CRAP in my room that needs to be reduced significantly if I'm gonna be sharing space with someone in a month. Did I mention that I need to pack? Am I starting to sound stressed?
There's SO much to do in one month...luckily I had time on the plane to make multiple to-do lists, so I feel a little better. But still...wow! W and I were talking about it today and it's finally starting to sink in for both of us. Maybe it's cuz we have an apartment now? I dunno what it is, but now it's crunch time. Like, for real!
We're still having issues with the registry (aka W's being picky about what goes on there and I don't care about what goes on there cuz it's the least of my worries). Any suggestions on what to ask for? I already threw in some fun things and people bought them for us! (homemade ice cream, here we come!) Suggestions are welcome- I keep forgetting basic household things because I have SO MUCH CRAP in my room that needs to be reduced significantly if I'm gonna be sharing space with someone in a month. Did I mention that I need to pack? Am I starting to sound stressed?
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
taking notes
Our friends J&C got married this past weekend (Congrats!) and W and I had the privilege of helping them on the big day. I got the behind-the-scenes look as a bridesmaid, and W was our trusty driver. The wedding was beautiful and went very smoothly thanks to the groom's detailed spreadsheet.
I loved being part of the bridal party, especially since C is such a great friend, and I think getting to support her on her big day was my favorite part. We ended up having a three-part toast (there were only three bridesmaids, including the MOH) and it was a fun opportunity to reflect on our friendship. The music was good, the food was good, dancing was fun...but really? It was just wonderful to share in a friend's joy.
I'll be in DC for another wedding this coming Sunday, so it'll be fun to share in yet another friend's joy! And yes, I've been taking notes at these weddings...gotta figure out what last minute things I can include in the wedding and what things are okay to omit.
A picture of W and me from the wedding: (aka proof that 2 weeks is just about right for his hair, and that my hair needs to be all up or the curls will fall out)
I loved being part of the bridal party, especially since C is such a great friend, and I think getting to support her on her big day was my favorite part. We ended up having a three-part toast (there were only three bridesmaids, including the MOH) and it was a fun opportunity to reflect on our friendship. The music was good, the food was good, dancing was fun...but really? It was just wonderful to share in a friend's joy.
I'll be in DC for another wedding this coming Sunday, so it'll be fun to share in yet another friend's joy! And yes, I've been taking notes at these weddings...gotta figure out what last minute things I can include in the wedding and what things are okay to omit.
A picture of W and me from the wedding: (aka proof that 2 weeks is just about right for his hair, and that my hair needs to be all up or the curls will fall out)
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